many things has been going on in my life. hehe that's a good thing tho ;)

i'm currently taking korean classes - preparation for my Korea trip 10 months from now. ohohoho 안녕하세요!!! ngee

it's been 2 weeks and i'm still struggling to read hangul. and a lot of vocab to memorize. but it's fun. hehe. google translator has been my best buddy and i will read raw noblesse manhwa if i ever want to practice reading in korea. uhh tho i dun have that much of free time..

and i've been courting someone. hihi. but this one i still have not much to say so i'll just leave it. ;)

i have a new interest in DIY bags, so i'm nurturing this interest as a new hobby, and hopefully advance in this professionally. it started when i was browsing around looking for a laptop sleeve and i came across this blog selling handmade ones. she's selling many kinds of handmade bags and it interests me. so i browsed and came across some tutorials to start creating DIY bags and last night, i finally put it into action to "test my power" and tried to hand-sew a zippered pouch. well, it turned out just ok, and i had confirmed that i can do this. it will not be an easy path - i never dream of being a seamstress (i seriously can't remember when was the last time i touch a needle). well, i still dunno if i ever will be one, but i do hope i will, at least a part time seamstress who can produce good quality of handmade bags ;)

today, while browsing this and that, i came across this anime review blog (a new one) and this blogger has a review on honey and clover anime. god, i couldn't agree less. he (or maybe she, i dunno..) rated it 5/10. woaa that's so unjust!! i know that's his personal rating, but i dun think that's a good review. i think this genre is just not his (or her) thing. like for me, i dun really like mecha anime - like gundam, and such. but since it's not my thing, i won't watch it or dare to rate it. because i will not be able to give a good review.

sigh.. i love honey and clover so much it upsets me. i know, i'm not being reasonable. people has different views. but honey and clover is (for me and many many other) the best anime in its genre. i have to re-watch it if i want to give a full review, for the last time i watched it was a few years back.

but i can still remember many scenes in it. the most vivid scene is when mayama was piggy-backing ayumi when she was drunk, and she confessed to him, "Mayama, suki". kyaa~~~ i felt it. how mayama had been dreading this very thing - the moment ayumi will tell him how she felt about him, how he should respond to her, it happened, and the way mayama replied "Yeah" over and over, i found the moment was so beautiful yet painful.. for both of them.

hagu is not annoying.. she's awkwardly cute. she's awkward because of how she grew up, having no close friends, only her talents. people can't understand her. the way she grew when she started to make friends with the other 4, is a beautiful thing. the way she sees thing are different from others. i guess that's the way geniuses are..

all in all, honey and clover is a beautiful anime with beautiful characters and story. huh? i end up writing a short review after all.. hehe

i realized that this blog of mine has no entries for anime at all!! and i dare calling myself an average otaku??? huh.. azra, you're getting waaayyy too lazy!! (actually i had friendster's blog loooong time ago and i used to post entries about a few animes i've been crazy about)

as of now, my top anime list are: nodame cantabile, one piece, honey and clover, fullmetal alchemist, oofuri (ookiku furikabutte), k-on!, k-on!! azumanga daioh, hale nochi guu,fruits basket, hikago (hikaru no go), nana, kaicho wa maid sama and the list goes on..

as for manga, the top list are: bleach, one piece, slamdunk, dragonball, yuyu hakusho, beelzebub, oresama teacher, crayon shin chan, and many others.

hm.. i guess that's all for today. i will try my best to post entry to review about more stuff - novels i read, songs i like, anime, manga, j-dorama, k-stuff, and whatsoever. this is for the sake to improve my writing skill ;)

okey, ja mata nee ^^

today is already third of January. and yet here i am, wayyy left out in posting an entry for the occasion. is it because i'm lacking the enthusiasm for celebrating the new year?? nawww... it's because i'm too preoccupied with my new hunny~~ ngeheee his name is kuro-nii. huhu three weeks ago i finally lost kuro-tan.. huhu due to my clumsiness, i lost him.. and only 3 days ago i bought a new phone. hehe i've been in love with this phone ever since kuro-tan showed symptom that's he's going to fail me.. and i named him kuro-nii (black no 2). hehe this new black is way sleekier than kuro-tan. hehe the down side is i can't set my fav song as its ringtone. maybe there's a way in doing that. i already searched on the net and found one, but haven't try it yet.

haha enough about the phone-talk. this entry supposed to be about new year right? i ought to be talking about resolutions and such..

well, last working day last year, hehe i meant to say on 30th December 2010, 3 days ago, i was listening to the radio, IKIM channel. hehe even I listen to ikim at times, mostly on the way back from work because usually i go back around maghrib time. and i was saying, there is a slot for a tazkirah, a topic on new year celebration of course. this ustaz was saying, before we go off to listing our new year resolution, we first must do a postmortem of the year. go through our resolutions of the current year, defining whether we had achieved our goal(s) of the year, and if we failed, to find out what are the reasons for the failure(s). he said we should find out the reasons, but not excuses. excuses won't bring us anywhere. and after finding out the reasons, to think of solutions to work it out. and to execute. in order to work this out, we must stop BANGAU-ing.

what the heck is that, you ask?

oh see, there is this old folk song we Malays sing in our childhood, it goes like this:

bangau oh bangau, kenapa engkau kurus?

macam mana aku tak kurus, ikan tidak timbul.

ikan oh ikan, kenapa engkau tak timbul?

macam mana aku nak timbul, rumput panjang sangat.

rumput oh rumput, kenapa engkau panjang sangat?

macam mana aku tak panjang, lembu tak makan aku.

on and on it goes until,

ular oh ular, kenapa kau nak makan katak?

macam mana aku tak makan, memang makanan aku.

the song goes on and on since each character in the song gave excuses for whatever situation they were in. until the snake put a stop to it - it says it's hunting for the frog because it (the frog) is what it(the snake) eats..

the point is, stop making excuses every time you're stuck in some deep sh*t. try to move forward. if a great wall is stopping you, move around it, somehow look for a way to pass it through. seek help, whatever, just don't sit there like a lump of meat, defeated, composing heaps of excuses should anyone would ask. you could always turn around, go back to your starting point, perhaps think about things you've done wrong, ways to get around it, and start over. no one is rushing you. it's not just about the destination, but the journey itself is darn important. it is life.

talk about rushing things out, two weeks ago i had an emotional breakdown.

if you read my new year entry last year, you would probably remember how i was in blues thinking that i'm getting another year older and yet i am still alone. well, it's not happening that way this year. because i am no longer alone? nawww... wrong answer.

i met a guy, and he's wayyyy younger than me. and he expressed his interest in me. i was puzzled. dear God, is this the one you sent to me? there was no way to find out, except trying to get to know him. knowing that he's sooo much younger than me. then i accepted, OK, there is no way in hell He sent this boy for me. and i softly pushed him away.

then, a friend introduced me to her hubby's best friend. he is a nice guy. we got along quite well. then he expressed his love for me with 3 roses. in 1 week. dear God, i wasn't flattered, i was getting scared!! this guy is serious and i was still struggling to get to know him. i feel nothing for him. then one day (week 2) it struck me. i don't dislike this man, but i can't like him. all i've been doing is look at his good points and make myself believe he is a good man. but do i like him? no.. it gave me an emotional breakdown. i cried myself out, thinking, oh God, is this really for me? do i have to accept anyone who comes into my life who i can't reject? just because i am getting old and perhaps i won't be getting any other chances?? it was such a great blow for me, it was so unfair. the thought "I have to" really made me damn depressed. is it so impossible for me to meet someone i like and likes me back? really? because i'm old??

then i went to see my best friend bart. and as always, her words put me at ease. why should i force myself? why am i doing things i don't like? don't i believe in Him? i have right to make my own choices. so what if i choose wrong? i'm a human after all, of course i make mistakes. why should i be afraid of making mistakes? have faith in Him. maybe He has other agenda for me. i don't feel IT with him, so maybe he's not the one. why should i feel rushed? why should i feel like my age is chasing me? age is not stoppable. it will come as it pleases. just let it be. i will try to go with my own pace. not feeling rushed. enjoy the journey, enjoy the life.

i said this before, in my previous entry, there are many blank spaces in my life. but my journey is still long (unless He said otherwise). who knows what i will find along the way? i look forward to continuing my journey this year. welcome, 2011!! :)

Salam all,

Two months had gone by since I last wrote. I've been feeling like writing for a while now, but been busy with other stuff, none is important enough tho ;)

Well, today's topic is about my camping trip early this month - Nov 5th until 7th, 2010 and the said Gunung Chemerong is located in Terengganu. It was my first time ever climbing a mountain!! I couldn't even believe myself when I told my best friend, Bart that I would like to join her. hihi..

The climb was DREADFUL, and HELLISH. God, I felt so stupid, keep asking my then-stupid-self why the hell am I doing this again? Why would I torture myself, to throw myself into the deep jungle, carrying the super heavy backpack on my delicate ( :P ) back?? I should be home lazying around, facebooking, watching tv and whatnot. Was I MENTAL??

Haha that was what exactly on my mind after it got dark. Who wouldn't thought like that? Ngee..

We started tracking at 9am. In the beginning, the trekking was so much fun, we chat a bit, started getting to know other members (out of 43 joiners, I only know 7 of them from previous activities), getting breathless, taking 5-es now and then, snapping photos of the people (myself mostly :P) and the nature. It was brilliant!! And after a few hours, we reached our first stop - Chemerong Waterfall. SUBHANALLAH, the waterfall is AMAZING~~

Then we continued our journey, and the trek got tougher, it started to rain. I chose to stay behind with the slowest team, since I doubted I can follow other's fast pace. Huhu I'm a novice, remember? So as the slowest team, we WERE slow.. huhu it was getting dark.. and we kept going. Finally the night fell, and we kept going on slower and slower. That was when all the cursing started. Roughly around 8-9pm, we reached bonsai park. This place has a REALLY amazing view. And we reached there in the middle of the night?? BIG DAMN!! Huhu so rugi.. I am so jealous when I look at others' pictures posing in the bonsai park. uhuuu.. We reached Gunung Berembun summit finally at I-don't-know-what-time-it-was-I-was-damn-exhausted. I was so damn pissed of, the exhaustion was really unbearable. It was so stupid to reach the summit in the middle of the night, I didn't even snap a pic there for memorial :(

After resting for quite sometime, we started to move our a**es to the campsite, we headed to Lansir Waterfall. Huh I tell you.. it was BEYOND hellish. The trek was terrible, the after-rain created puddles of mud, the track was super steep, it was sooo dark, total nightmare. But the team were really helpful, they helped me a lot, all the time.

It was 11pm when we finally reached our campsite. I was beyond wasted. I dragged myself to join Bart to wash up, solat and eat. And finally.. sleep~~ Oh, during the late dinner, gogo - Fendi asked me, how was it? And I was like huuu I don't want to do this ever again.. hahaha they all laughed. Apparently, most hikers say that when they're tired, but soon, they'll be asking for more. Now I totally get it ;)

I started to get that feeling when I was enjoying the morning view from Lansir. It was brilliant.. SUBHANALLAH.. Boy I was glad to be there.

That afternoon we went to have a swim and play around at the waterfall. It was a true bliss... the water is so cold, so pure. Ahh I really had a great time there with the team..

That evening, after napping a bit, I went to lie on the big rocks - star gazing. Shiawase~~ so peaceful. I haven't done this in years!! After a while, a girl who shared the tent together with us, came to join me - Radi. We chatted about this and that, until dinner call came ;)

The next morning, we packed our stuff, clear the campsite and started trekking down. The trekking went rather smoothly, well, it was quite tough, the track is suuuper steep, but we managed to get to base in shorter time than scheduled.

We freshened up, excitedly chatting with each other, strangers two days ago are now good buddies, feasting at the canteen, more photo-shooting, more laughter. Nobody seemed to care that the bus was running late. When it was finally there, we happily, tho tiredly loaded ourselves and our backpacks into the bus and returned to KL.

It was an amazing experience, I'll definitely do that again ;)

hv u noticed lately i only write (if i ever write, that is..) abt korean stuff most of the time. korean drama, korean songs, movies, bands, jang geun suk, i hv interest in korean food, hanbok, everything korean. well, i've been a fan for as long as i can remember, but before this, it's always been nihongo. i really really luv anything about japanese - dorama, jpop, anime, manga, movie, a bit of their culture, kimono, bunga sakura, novel pasal geisha, zaman edo, etc..

sigh.. i was swept away by the big hallyu..

and today, ahem slow sikit.. when i was having a break in the office, i was searching for baking king kim takgu ost, when i came across BLACKOUT - the brilliant green's newly released album. aren't i lucky??? yay~~ in an instant i hv their new songs!!

the first track - blackout was ok the first time i listened. it got better track after track. the third track really nice - i'm sick of this place. i was entranced once again by tomoka's sweet voice. it got way better with talk to me, then boom!! blue daisy, i was blown away. i fell in love!! then i was pretty occupied with work i was unable to savor each and every song. until now. hohoho now i hv all the time in the world.

i did some research and found in wiki that blackout was scheduled for release on September 15, 2010. err 2 days ago?? really?? talk about lucky~~ (btw, now going underground is playing in the background, it's superb!!)

actually i was never a big fan of buriguri (i found that this is what fans call 'em. same like l`arc~en~ciel, their short name is laruku, etc..) i was a fan alright, i love their songs, and the vocalist's voice. but never to the extent to find out about the members, buying their albums & singles and whatnot. but i know a few of their songs back in uni time - forever to me, sono speed de, there will be love there, hello another way, maybe we could go back to then. but that's all about it. jpop songs resources are scarce back then, and i was a poor student.. what i hv was what being passed around by friends. but really, i love their music.

so when today i came across their music again, i was, and AM THRILLED. well, i am now NOT a poor student, but one wonders why i still choose downloading path?? ngeee gomenn.. (anyway i just can't breathe is playing - and another superb song!!)

i read about them a bit here and there, downloading a few more songs recommended by a fellow big fan. now only i know, tsumetai hana really is an awesome song!! i fell in love in an instant!! as i go on listening to their old songs, i came to understand a point by another fellow big fan, their music sounds a bit different from back then - before their guitarist quit. well, i'm no music expert, so i can't be that sure tho.. ohh.. like yesterday is brilliant!!

yoshh.. now that i'd listened to each and every track, i can end this entry already. all in all, the songs are marvelous!!

lately i've been super busy. ehehe berbanding ngn idop aku selama nih yg terlebeh masa free, skg aku memang bz amat.. last week jek lahu sket. tuh pong sbb potential client (skg da jadi client) mintak tempoh masa seblom setuju ngn quotation kami.

ngehee.. aku bz ngn hape??

hehe prev entry aku ada mention psl idop aku xde ups n downs, just long straight hiway?? and too much 'me time'. in other words, idop aku agak boring - no challenges and no changes at all..

suddenly, teja jadi aktif lak.. meeting sana.. meeting sini.. da siap 1 projek kecik - tp payment x dapat2 lagik.. huhu. then da secure second deal - skg work in progress. yg nih medium-scale project - tp ktorg caj murah glos.. pasal client nih kedekut tahap.. huhu. hopefully it will go smoothly..

pastu lagi, aku pon da start home tutor kat 2 org anak dato', start last week. so bleh kata rezeki skg sangat murah utk aku. Alhamdulillah.. i will work hard!!! if only company aku bleh increase gaji, alangkah best nya... life wud be better - i can deal with my free time as freely as possible - aku bleh g mana2 pon aku nk gi, bleh buat pape je aktiviti yg aku nk wat, bleh bli pape yg rasa nk beli - total freedom!! and if only my mr right muncul lam idop aku, walla life wud b perfect!! am i asking too much?? tp DIA maha pemurah.. semuga DIA akan makbulkan doa2 ku.. (_ _)

wokeh enuff dreaming, time to work!! yosh gambaruzou~~~